Bipolar Supporter Blog

Hi,

Do you remember when you were young and the fair would come to town? It was like everything would stop just for those few days of fun and excitement. Every kid would be great in school and on their best behavior at home, because there was NO way they were going to miss being able to go to the fair.

Do you remember what your favorite ride was back then? That may have changed over the years.
But many people loved the merry-go-round when they were kids. They have really good memories of the fair. For many people it was a happier time.

Of course…Because when you’re a kid you don’t have to deal with adult problems. Like, in most cases, you don’t have to deal with bipolar disorder. Although many people have shared with me that they believe they’ve had bipolar disorder all their lives. And there is such a thing as pediatric bipolar disorder, where children can get it too. But I’m just talking in general here.

Still…When you’re talking about bipolar disorder, you can be talking about a merry-go-round ride anyway. And it certainly isn’t fun like it was when you were a kid and rode it at the fair.
The mood swings themselves of bipolar disorder can be like a merry-go-round ride.

Just ask your loved one. One day they’re up. One day they’re down. And they don’t feel like they have any control over it. It can be so frustrating for them. It can really get them down. It’s no fun at all. But it can be no fun at all for you, either.

You can feel like you’re on your own merry-go-round ride yourself sometimes. You can go on their ups and downs right with them. As well as going on ups and downs yourself.

It’s just normal that you might have moods that fluctuate, too. After all…It certainly isn’t smooth sailing for you, either. There is quite a bit of stress that comes from trying to cope and deal with a loved one with bipolar disorder.

And sometimes you aren’t exactly “up.” In fact…Sometimes you can feel pretty “down.” Sometimes it can really feel like a ride, with moods changing frequently.

So what can you do about it? The best thing you can do is: BE CONSISTENT. At least as consistent as you can. That’s the best thing for your loved one, and the best thing for yourself as well.

You can’t always predict what’s going to happen, whether tomorrow or next week. But consistency is the next best thing. You need to be able to count on some things, anyway.

If your loved one knows that you will act in a predictable manner, it will help them to cope better. And if you learn to react in a predictable manner, it will help you to cope better. You will have less stress. You will feel as if things are more stable. You will feel like you’re not as much on a merry-go-round.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

 

Hi,

What’s new? Hope you are doing well.

To read this week’s news visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews703/

Research: First effective web-based treatment for Bipolar Disorder
DO> This intervention could help your loved one.

Bipolar II disorder course mapped in Japanese patients
DO> Interesting study, don’t you agree?

Research could lead to earlier diagnosis, treatment of mental diseases
DO> Important study, don’t you think?

Youth Olympics put focus on mental health disorders
DO> Do you agree with this man’s opinion?

Melody Moezzi on bipolar disorder: “I believed I was a prophet”
DO> You’ll find this interview very interesting.

Man found dead in park faced many challenges, sister says
DO> This man’s story is very sad, wouldn’t you say?

Genetics may underpin psychiatric comorbidity in bipolar patients
DO> This study makes an important point.

Fitness-related traits in bipolar disorder relatives may explain disease persistence
DO> This study reveals something very interesting.

Survey of veterans receiving mental health services finds general satisfaction
DO> These results make you think, don’t they?

For these stories and more, please visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews703/

Check out all my resources, programs and information for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentralcatalog.com

Your Friend,

Dave

Hi,

Today I want to talk about bubble gum. Yep. You read it correctly – bubble gum! Before you think I’ve gone crazy… I know you’re asking yourself, what does bubble gum have to do with bipolar disorder?

Well, I’ll tell you: Remember that old song, “Does your chewing gum lose its flavor on the bedpost overnight?” Well, whether you know the song or not, the idea is that after chewing bubble gum for awhile, it gets stale, doesn’t it? It loses its flavor, and it gets stale, and you have
to throw it out.

Now here comes the bipolar disorder part. Are you sure you want to hear this? Are you really sure? Ok, the truth is that after awhile, the things you’ve tried to help your loved one to stay
stable with their bipolar disorder just get old. They get stale, just like bubble gum.

What do you do with bubble gum when it gets stale? You do one of two things:

1. You throw it out.

2. You get a fresh piece.

So that’s my point. When what you’re doing with your loved one isn’t working any more, think about that bubble gum, and take a lesson from it. Either stop doing what you’re doing that isn’t
working any more, or try something “fresh” – something new!

If you only do one thing over and over again, and if it doesn’t work, (it gets “stale” like the
bubble gum), it’s certainly NOT going to help your loved one get any better. And it’s not going to help you, either. You have to try something new.

You can do it! Think of something you’ve not ever tried before. Think of new ideas. Talk to other supporters – maybe they’ve tried things that you haven’t. But whatever you do, it has to be something you haven’t tried before.

Like…How about surprising your loved one with a “reward” for “good behavior”? Cook them their favorite meal. Take them out to their favorite restaurant. Go out to the movies. Or rent their favorite video and stay in, popping some popcorn to go with it. Visit some friends or family. Go to a museum or art gallery. Go shopping and let them buy something they want.

Just something “fresh,” something new. I’m sure you can come up with some good ideas, can’t you?

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

 

Hi,

I’ve been thinking about something, and wanted to share my thoughts with you. It’s about what happens when you try to accomplish too much too fast. Think about it. When you try to accomplish too much too fast, you are just setting yourself up for failure, because you’ll never be able to do it. It can also get very discouraging for you.

Also, if you don’t know how long something should take, you can start to think it’s taking too long. For example, after an episode. It could take up to a year to fully “fix” the after effects of an episode. Like the financial ruin – you can’t fix a bankruptcy in just two weeks! But some people think you can just do it overnight!

We don’t rush the stroke victim or even the cancer victim, why do we rush the victim of bipolar disorder? Thinking that they should be over an episode after just a week or two is just plain
unrealistic expectations. Would we have that same expectation if they were getting over a physical illness? Then why are we expecting it from a bipolar episode?

There are certain things in life that take a certain amount of time to happen. It’s just the way it has to be. Think about things in nature. Like the butterfly – it starts off as a caterpillar…Then it goes into a cocoon… And only after a certain period of time does it change (through the process of metamorphosis) into that beautiful butterfly! It just doesn’t happen overnight. And if you interrupt it at any point in the chain of events, the whole thing would be ruined!

Some things just can’t be rushed. Other things just have to take place in a certain order. And still other things have to take place at a certain time. Wanting your loved one who has bipolar disorder to get over their episode overnight is like wanting them to be that beautiful butterfly
without going through the cocoon phase!

Some things are just worth waiting for. You just have to be more patient sometimes. Part of being a good supporter is being patient and understanding. And this is one of those areas where that patience and understanding will be tried. It helps to know the process. For one thing, your loved one didn’t get this way overnight, and they aren’t going to get better overnight, either.

But they will be putting forth the effort to get better, and they will need your love, patience,
support, and understanding as they go through the process of getting better. So understanding that it is a process might help you as well. Your loved one won’t get better overnight, but
the good news is that, working together with you by their side, they can get better.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

 

Hi,

What’s new? Hope you are doing well.

To read this week’s news visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews702/

Duration of undiagnosed bipolar disorder unrelated to treatment response
DO> Interesting study, don’t you agree?

World’s first anti-psychotic patch being tested by mental health trust
DO> This treatment could help your loved one.

Web-based psychological self-help may aid bipolar patients
DO> This study makes a good point.

Research: First effective web-based treatment for Bipolar Disorder
DO> Important study, don’t you think?

How depression and anxiety are linked to Robin Williams’s death
DO> Some good information for you.

Low Carb Ketogenic Diet Combats Depression and Bipolar Disorder
DO> This diet could help your loved one.

Bipolar II disorder course mapped in Japanese patients
DO> Wouldn’t you say this is an important study?

For these stories and more, please visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews702/

Check out all my resources, programs and information for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentralcatalog.com

Your Friend,

Dave

Hi,

You know, recently I heard this saying, “Bipolar disorder is like candy – if you don’t manage it right, it can make you really, really sick.” It sounds almost funny, but it’s true. You can almost compare the bipolar manic episodes to too much candy/too much sugar.

You get really, really high, really hyper. You feel great – on top of the world! All your ideas (grandiose ideas) are great ideas – you don’t understand why they’ve never been thought of before. You have so much energy, you could go on forever – who needs to sleep, anyway?

And money IS like candy – you think you have an endless supply of it, you go through it until
it’s gone, with no thought of how you’re going to feel afterwards (or of what the consequences
are going to be). And the fun – oh the fun! What a grand time you’re having! …until the inevitable crash. Just like the crash you’d have after eating a lot of candy. That high does not last forever.

And there are always consequences to pay (sometimes some pretty harsh ones). That feeling-great-on-top-of-the-world feeling becomes a deep depression. So deep, in fact, that you may even become suicidal (some people have even killed themselves).

Your great ideas are only great to you – to other people they may seem a bit odd, or even
crazy. After all that energy is gone, and that lack of sleep catches up to you, you may hit the bed
and not emerge for days (or weeks) at a time.

And that spending spree? The overdrawn checking account…The credit card debt…The loss of your car… your home…The loss of your/your family’s possessions…The bankruptcy…The financial ruin…

But worst of all…Is the loss of trust from your supporter. Because the consequences of your behavior may extend beyond everything I already listed. You may not remember what you’ve done during a bipolar episode, but your supporter, family, and friends do.

You may have done or said things that truly hurt your supporter, and they are still stinging
from them. They may be feeling mistrustful, hurt, angry, resentful, embarrassed (because of things you’ve done in public)…isolated, lonely… among other negative feelings/emotions.
All because of you.

You might want them to feel sorry for you, and may not understand their distance (after all,
they’ve been through a lot, too). What you need to remember is that bipolar disorder is not only your disorder. Because of you, it’s your supporter’s disorder as well.

They have to deal with the consequences of your behavior when you’ve had an episode. You may have even lied to them during a bipolar episode and not remember it now…But they do. There are always consequences from a bipolar episode.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

 

Hi,

There was an article in Reader’s Digest that I read that talked about ways you can hide all sorts of things. For example: They talked about how to hide extra weight just by changing the way you dress, or by the way you accessorize the way you dress. And how to hide your personal identity (especially on the Internet) so that you don’t fall prey to identity theft.

This was an important one, and if you go online a lot, you can check with your Internet provider for help with this. There are also companies out there now that help with avoiding Identity Theft.

You can hide from phone solicitors by getting on the National Do Not Call Registry by calling this number: 1-888-382-1222. You can hide your phone number from people by having it unlisted by the phone company. Then it doesn’t even appear in telephone books.

You can even hide your bad breath by nibbling on a sprig of parsley or lemon rind, or drinking a cup of black or green tea.

But although this was an interesting article to read, and it did have some practical information on how to hide your things (and yourself), it didn’t tell you that there are some things that you can never hide. Like your bipolar disorder.

Telling people whether you have bipolar disorder or not is a personal choice. It’s up to you whether you tell people that you have it or not.

And even though that’s true, that it is a personal choice whether you tell people you have bipolar
disorder or not, and if you choose not to tell people you may be able to hide it from them…If you have bipolar disorder, you still can’t hide it from yourself. You’ll always have the disorder (unless they find a cure for it).

You can’t hide from the fact that you have to take medication every day for the rest of your life in
order to keep from going into bipolar episodes. Even if you choose not to tell others that you have bipolar disorder, they can usually tell anyway – especially those closest to you, like friends and family.

And you will never be able to hide your bipolar disorder from your supporter. Unless you’re perfect, which none of us are. Even with medication, there will be times that the signs and symptoms of your disorder will be there anyway. And you can’t hide them from your supporter.

You shouldn’t even try, because for one thing, the stress of trying to do that will just make you worse. But mostly because your supporter cares about you – They wouldn’t have stayed with you if they didn’t. They just want to help you, and they can’t do that if you try to hide your bipolar disorder from them.

Your disorder isn’t going to go away. There’s no use trying to hide from it (or to hide it). Are you still trying to? Is it helping you or hurting you? Have you stopped trying to hide your bipolar disorder?

If you are a supporter, there are things you can’t hide, either. Like you can’t hide your negative feelings. If you try, they will still come out in negative ways. So you need to try to talk to your loved one about them. Or at least write about them in a notebook or journal to get them out. This will lower your stress so that you don’t get sick or stressed out from it.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

 

Hi,

What’s new? Hope you are doing well.

To read this week’s news visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews701/

‘Soft’ bipolar spectrum disorders differ from depression
DO> Interesting study, don’t you agree?

Mania Risk Seen in Treating Bipolar Patients With Antidepressants Alone
DO> These researchers reported some interesting results.

Gene Variants, Mutations Associated with Several Mental Disorders
DO> Important study, don’t you think?

Study Explores Decision-making Abilities in Bipolar Disorder Patients
DO> This study reveals something very interesting.

This Smartphone App Listens to Bipolar Patients’ Voices to Spot Manic Episodes
DO> This app could help your loved one.

Duration of undiagnosed bipolar disorder unrelated to treatment response
DO> These results make you think, don’t they?

Report: Bipolar disorder tops health topic searches on mobile devices
DO> This report raises an interesting point.

Duration of undiagnosed bipolar disorder unrelated to treatment response
DO> Good study, wouldn’t you say?

Web-based psychological self-help may aid bipolar patients
DO> Wouldn’t you say this is an important study?

For these stories and more, please visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews701/

Check out all my resources, programs and information for all aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentralcatalog.com

Your Friend,

Dave

Hi,

I remember when I was dealing with my mom’s big episode, one of the worst things I faced was her anger. I know, too, from the many emails and letters I get from bipolar supporters, that anger is a common issue that many other supporters face as well.

When people with bipolar disorder go into a bipolar episode, they can sometimes feel very angry. They can get angry that they are depressed or manic. They can get angry that things aren’t fair, or that they feel that life itself isn’t fair (or at least feel that it hasn’t been fair to them). They can be angry that maybe they had to lose their job because of their bipolar disorder.

They can be angry that their family is treating them differently. They can be angry because they feel society (their community) is treating them differently. They can be angry because of the diagnosis of bipolar disorder itself. They can be angry because they feel differently.

Mostly, they are probably angry because they feel like they are not in control. They probably feel like the bipolar disorder is in control of them. Although this is a common feeling for people with
bipolar disorder to have, it still doesn’t excuse the fact that they are probably taking their angry
feelings out on you.

So how do you deal with your loved one’s anger? One way is to validate their emotional state and feelings. Now, I’m not saying that you have to agree with everything they think and feel, nor with how they’re acting. But validating their emotional state and feelings means that you can say something like, “I can see how you might feel that way.”

This makes your loved one feel as if you are at least listening to what they have to say, even if you don’t agree with them, and you are acknowledging their right to feel the way they do. This is important to them.

Another thing you can do when your loved one is angry is to ask how you can help. Notice I didn’t say to ask IF you can help, because then all you’re going to get is a yes or no answer, and that’s not really going to help you. But by asking HOW you can help, you will get a clearer direction in exactly what your loved one is looking for from you.

One thing you DON’T want to do is to fight back with explanations. This just puts you on the defensive, and only prolongs the fight. Explanations are a force of habit. We really do believe that if we can just explain ourselves, our loved one will see that they have no reason to be angry.
That’s assuming that when your loved one is in the throes of bipolar anger that they are totally
rational, but that’s not usually the case. In fact, it’s usually the opposite, so you need to treat them as such.

Definitely do NOT patronize them, though, as they will resent that and just get more angry at
you. But if you try to explain yourself, your loved one will see that as a way to prove them wrong, belittle their beliefs, or avoid blame, so you don’t want to do that, either. It’s best just to avoid giving explanations for your behavior, opinions, beliefs, feelings, etc., especially when they are contrary to your loved one’s.

If you really feel as though you need to make your point, save it for a time when your loved one is more calm and rational and is not experiencing bipolar anger.

Having your loved one angry at you is not a pleasant experience, but knowing how to deal with it can certainly help. Try using these techniques the next time your loved one is experiencing bipolar anger.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave

 

PLEASE FORWARD TO YOUR FRIENDS

Hi {!firstname_fix},

What’s new? Hope you are doing well.

To read this week’s news visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews700/

Link Found Between Glutamate, Adolescent Bipolar Disorder
DO> These results make you think, don’t they?

Optimism app can help patient with mood disorders
DO> This app can help your loved one.

Study Details Risk Factors for Substance Use Disorders After Manic Episode
DO> Interesting study, don’t you agree?

Gene variant linked to schizophrenia, bipolar disorder and alcoholism
DO> Important study, don’t you think?

Impulse control predicts euthymia in bipolar disorder
DO> This study makes an important point.

Bipolar Depression Treated With Low-Strength Magnetic Stimulation May Improve Moods Faster
DO> This study reveals something very interesting.

Genetic Mutation Found In 1 Of Every 200 People Linked To Alcoholism, Schizophrenia, And …
DO> Wouldn’t you say this is an important study?

People with bipolar disorder take risks
DO> Good study, wouldn’t you say?

Earlier treatment better for bipolar patients
DO> Don’t you think this is an important study?

Impaired emotion recognition runs in families with psychosis
DO> Interesting study, don’t you agree?

For these stories and more, please visit:
http://www.bipolarcentral.com/bipolarnews700/

POST RESPONSES TO THE NEWS HERE
http://www.bipolarsupporter.com/bipolarsupporterblog

Check out all my resources, programs and information for all
aspects of bipolar disorder by visiting:
http://www.bipolarcentralcatalog.com

Your Friend,

Dave