Hi,

If you have children, you’ll understand this…When your children were little, did you do this:

When they wouldn’t do as well at something as they wanted to (or as you would have liked them

to)…Did you say: “Well, at least you did your best.” Or, even if you don’t have children… Maybe your parents said that to you to try to encourage you at times when that happened to you.

Good parents say that to their children: “Just try your best.” That’s usually all they require. They just want you to try your best, even if you don’t always succeed. So you try your best and…Let the rest go. That’s all you can do sometimes. Especially when you’re dealing with a loved one

with bipolar disorder. If you don’t learn to just try your best and let the rest go, you’re going to burn out.

See…The emphasis is on letting the rest go here. You can’t do everything right, and you have to

accept that. You’re not always going to have all the answers. And that can be frustrating sometimes. I know…I went through it with my mother. And it was frustrating that sometimes I would think I had the answer…And then that would just stop working! And then I would have to try something else. And that would be frustrating too. So I had to learn the lesson about only trying my best and letting the rest go. Or else I would’ve driven myself crazy! And I don’t want you to go there. I don’t want you to burn out, either.

There are no hard and fast rules when it comes to bipolar disorder. Unfortunately. I mean, when it comes to being a supporter. There are when you have the disorder. Like, there is a hard and fast rule that you have to take your medication every day. That’s a given. That’s an easy rule.

But no one set down rules in a book that a supporter can follow that would make things easy for us. A lot of what we go through is just trial and error. And that can be really hard sometimes.

Some of what we do that works with our loved ones we get from other supporters who have tried things that have worked with their loved ones. And that can help. But largely we’re on our own.

And we have to find out what works with our own loved one. And even with that there are problems. Like sometimes what worked yesterday may not work today. So you have to change your approach. You have to try something different. Again…All you can do is your best…

And let the rest go. Or you will end up really frustrated. You have to keep trying to hold onto your positive attitude…And keep believing that something you will try will work with your loved one.

Well, I have to go!

Your Friend,

Dave