=>PLEASE FORWARD TO FRIENDS, FAMILY AND LOVED ONES <=\n\nHi,\n\nHow’s it going?\n\nI actually have to get going fairly
quick.<\/p>\n
I can’t wait until next week when 3 of the really
smart people that work for me working in this
organization dedicated to helping bipolar supporters
and survivors get back. Three
have been out for the last week either
one vacation or doing personal things.<\/p>\n
Yesterday I sent out an email on the dangers
of using the word “why” and bipolar disorder.<\/p>\n
You can read it on my blog below again if you
like.<\/p>\n
I saw some interesting AND thoughtful
responses (as opposed to responses that
make no sense which you might have seen
a few days ago).<\/p>\n
josephine_mamo_17 said… <\/p>\n
“Hi Dave,
I am normally a very big follower of yours
and i always appreciate the help that you give us,
whether we have bipolar or are supporters. i do want
to point out the danger to you in saying what you
said in your last email. <\/p>\n
i found when i was with my partner, that even when
i was on stable mediacations and a great treatment
plan if i ever felt a normal emotion of anger or
frustration, he would not take me seriously and just
say ‘oh its just your bipolar again’. <\/p>\n
in the end i was always so afraid to confront my feelings
because i thought that i was off my nut or having an
episode just because i felt a normal emotion. i agree
saying stupid things like you owe a woman money in a
different state is quite crazy but to say ‘there is no
why’ is a bit extreme alsodont you think?in fact i
think it is unjust and comments like that are what
make people like me feel so isolated and alone in the
world. <\/p>\n
no one will take us seriously if we all have
that mentality. i appreciate that you are watching
out for all of those who suffer crazy accusations,
but maybe just be careful with us who dont make
many accusations but still get told we are crazy
all the time.”<\/p>\n
Another person wrote something else:<\/p>\n
TNJ Fish Enterprises said…
“hi dave,<\/p>\n
I just wanted to say bravo! Many people don’t
get it. Josephine I realize your anger but when
I pointed out to my husband how rediculous it
was to blame every emotion on being bipolar He
started looking for when I truely was bipolar.
When he started looking so did I and that was
scary. <\/p>\n
I realized that alot of times I may not
have been in a full blown bipolar phase but I
did over exaggerate the situation to make myself
right. I want to say to david thank you so much
for all the words of encouragement with your help
I got back on track and started my own internet
b.usiness. I never could have done it without you
and my husband. I am happy that I can see what
is going on in my world(the world of bipolar).
I love feeling like I am back in the real world
again.”<\/p>\n
I want to clarify something. When I was talking
about the danger of asking why, I was referencing
asking why a person says or does something in
a bipolar episode–nothing else. I was NOT talking
about asking why a person gets off medications,
doesn’t want to go to a doctor\/therapist, doesn’t
want to admit they have bipolar disorder etc. That’s
a different why and I am going to write about
that soon. Not tomorrow because tomorrow is the
bipolar news. Probably this coming Monday. I am making
a note.<\/p>\n
What I am talking about is this. Okay a person
is in a bipolar episode and he or she turns
into a different person. You are a supporter and
they scream and yell at you. Maybe they throw
a phone at you. Maybe they say you the bipolar
supporter are the worst person in the entire world.
Maybe they (in the bipolar episode), say that
you (the bipolar supporter), have done so many
bad things. They make up things, say horrible
things.<\/p>\n
Now, the natural inclination to the untrained
person is to try to figure out why this person
is saying that to you. You may think, “could
I be the worst person in the world?” “Did I
do something wrong?” You start to second guess
yourself. On the one hand, you know you are
working VERY hard to help. But on the other hand
the person who is in the bipolar episode is hurling
negative things towards your way. <\/p>\n
You keep asking why. Then you get almost depressed.
You just can’t understand. You search for answers.<\/p>\n
This is the danger. This is a waste of time. There
is no logical or rational reason (99% of the time).
It’s just that the person is not themselves. They
need to get into treatment. To have their medication
changed or modified.<\/p>\n
This is what I was talking about. Again I wasn’t
talking about the other whys: why someone won’t
take medication, go to the doctor, admit they
have bipolar disorder, etc.<\/p>\n
Make sense?<\/p>\n
Now to address what Josephine wrote above.<\/p>\n
Here’s the deal. Many bipolar supporters
have great difficulty figuring out what’s bipolar
disorder, a normal emotion, or when a person is
in a bipolar episode.<\/p>\n
To me, it’s easy. In my courses below for bipolar
supporters, I talk about how to determine this. The
interviews in my course go into this in great depth.<\/p>\n
This is a SKILL. It’s like riding a bike. It takes
time to learn this skill. I can tell 95% of the time
when something is a normal emotion of my mom or it’s
something related to her bipolar disorder.<\/p>\n
My dad struggles with this. Why? Well it’s because he
never had to learn it. He just counts on me telling him.
He uses me as a crutch.<\/p>\n
My brother absolutely positively never understands that
people with bipolar disorder have normal emotions. For
example, one time someone cut off my mom, screamed and
yelled at her for NOTHING. For nothing. She did not
one single thing. How do I know? I was there. I was
SUPER MAD! I was ready to get his license plate and
repot him to the police and have his license taken
away for the rest of his life (which you can’t do
by the way). Anyway, I was super mad. 100 times more
mad than my mom.<\/p>\n
My mom was kind of mad. Not that mad. She told me to
calm down. I get mad at that kind of thing. That’s the
way it is on the east coast. You cut someone off and
you can trigger world war 3 LOL. <\/p>\n
Anyway, back when my brother was talking to us,
my mom mentioned it. She did so in a calm way
but expressed how she couldn’t believe someone
would be so mean. I was still mad. My brother
made the comment to me, “oh there she goes
again with her bipolar.”<\/p>\n
I was like, “huh?” He said, “yea it looks
like she is going into an episode or whatever
it’s called again.” <\/p>\n
I was super confused. I was like, “why?” He said
because she is mad about someone cutting her off.
At that point I realized how unfair my brother
was being to my mom and how clueless he really
was. I tried to explain to him but he never listens
to anything.<\/p>\n
At that point, I realized I had to train myself
to know what’s bipolar and what’s normal reactions.<\/p>\n
The bottom line Josephine is that it seems that
your supporter needs more training in this area.
He has to realize it’s a skill and he has to
learn it. He has to be willing to do so. <\/p>\n
That’s the bottom line. The hard part is,
many bipolar supporters are too lazy to learn
the skill (half of my family). Know what I mean?<\/p>\n
In my courses\/systems below I cover how
to learn the skill of knowing what’s a
episode and what isn’t. <\/p>\n
In my bipolar success course below for those
with bipolar disorder, I have a f.ree report
titled “How to get people to believe you.”<\/p>\n
SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER? SUPPORTING A CHILD\/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER? HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER? Why do I have that report? Years ago I found I think that everyone should read TNJ Fish It contains some great information. I don’t Finally I want to say one last thing about the There was a post on my blog where some had The person wrote: I appreciate the suggestion but this is an example Do you agree or disagree?<\/p>\n Your Friend,<\/p>\n Dave<\/p>\n ===>> Great Resources For You <===\n\nGet Your Own Subscription To This Newsletter Get More Help On Bipolar Disorder View Past Daily Bipolar Emails For F.REE Get Audio Information On Bipolar Disorder For F.REE =PLEASE FORWARD TO FRIENDS, FAMILY AND LOVED ONES Great Resources For You <\/p>\n
Visit:
http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/report11<\/a><\/p>\n
Visit:
http:\/\/www.bipolarparenting.com<\/a><\/p>\n
Visit:
http:\/\/www.survivebipolar.net<\/a><\/p>\n
that for many with bipolar disorder it’s hard
for them to get those around them to believe
them when something is serious. So I created a
system for my mom in case I wasn’t around. The
system is outlined in the f.ree report.<\/p>\n
Enterprises response above a few times. <\/p>\n
have time to go into it right now. But it’s
all there. <\/p>\n
danger of asking why.<\/p>\n
some suggestions as to why someone who I don’t
know, has never bought a thing from me, who lives
thousands of miles away would call me and say I took
a plane last night and stole $400 from them and the
flew back home.<\/p>\n
“maybe she felt influence in doing something
that probably cost her $400 and she regrets it,
so she has to blame someone.”<\/p>\n
of what I mean. There is no logical thing or reason
we could come up to explain what the person did.
She was not in her right mind at all. That’s it. We need
not even spend one minute thinking about why a person
would do or say such a thing. They are not thinking
straight. There is no, “maybe she accused you because…”<\/p>\n
Want your own copy of these daily bipolar
emails sent to you for F.ree? If so, visit:
http:\/\/www.bipolarcentral.com\/register3<\/a><\/p>\n
Don’t forget to take a look through the
different programs I’ve put together… each
one is designed to help you with a different
area of bipolar disorder whether you have it or
you are supporting someone with it.
You can see them all and get the details by visiting:
http:\/\/www.bipolarcentral.com\/catalog.asp<\/a><\/p>\n
Check out my F.ree blog with copies of emails
that I have sent in the past and lots of great
information for you:
http:\/\/www.bipolarcentral.com\/supporterblog\/<\/a><\/p>\n
Check out my F.ree podcast. Hear me give
mini seminars designed to teach you information
you can’t learn anywhere else.
http:\/\/bipolarcentral.libsyn.com<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"