Hi,<\/p>\n
I was talking to this supporter the other day, and he shared some feelings with me that I wanted to share with you, because you might be feeling the same way.<\/p>\n
He said: \u201cI\u2019m sick and tired of everything I read and everywhere I hear telling me that my wife\u2019s behavior is not her fault just because she\u2019s got bipolar disorder. I think that\u2019s just an excuse for unacceptable behavior. I\u2019m not saying it\u2019s her fault, necessarily, but I do think she needs to take responsibility for her behavior, for her actions. I don\u2019t think I should just lie down and take it just because she\u2019s got bipolar disorder.\u201d<\/p>\n
I think he brings up a good point. Should you have to just \u201ctake\u201d your loved one\u2019s behavior \u201clying down\u201d just because they\u2019ve got bipolar disorder and not do anything about it? Maybe you feel like this man does, like your loved one is \u201cgetting away with it\u201d if you do. Well\u2026I agree that your loved one should take responsibility for their behavior. I think that bipolar disorder does have something to do with their behavior, like with the impulsivity, for example. But I also think at some point they can make choices about their behavior. And I believe this because I did an interview one time with a woman who has bipolar disorder, and she told me so. She said that when she was in a manic episode it was like she knew that her behavior was wrong, she just didn\u2019t care. She said she just kept making bad choices. That tells me that there is an element of choice involved there somewhere. And that your loved one can take responsibility for their behavior and their actions and not just use their bipolar disorder as an excuse for them.<\/p>\n
Here\u2019s an example of how someone was able to do that: There\u2019s a man whose wife has bipolar disorder. And when she goes into a manic episode, she spends money like it\u2019s going out of style.<\/p>\n
He wanted his wife to start taking responsibility for her behavior, so he told her if she did it again, he would take away all her money, and she wouldn\u2019t be able to buy anything anymore.<\/p>\n
So guess what? The next time she spent money excessively, he took away all her money. And she wasn\u2019t able to buy anything. At first she complained about it\u2026And her husband explained over and over that it was because of her behavior that it had happened, and a choice she had made to spend the money. He reminded her that she needed to take responsibility for her behavior. After a few times, she stopped spending money excessively, because she didn\u2019t want all her money taken away from her.<\/p>\n
Here\u2019s another example: There was a woman whose husband would fly into really bad rages because of his bipolar disorder. She told him that every time he went into a rage, that she was just going to ignore him, because she wanted him to take responsibility for his behavior.<\/p>\n
The next time he flew into a rage, she completely ignored him. And the next time. And the time after that. Eventually her husband took responsibility for his behavior and stopped going into rages and talked to her about his feelings of anger instead.<\/p>\n
You see\u2026The bipolar disorder may cause your loved one to initially start the unwanted behavior\u2026But if they don\u2019t like or want the consequences associated with that behavior, they can stop the behavior.<\/p>\n
Well, I have to go!<\/p>\n
Your Friend,<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Dave<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Hi,<\/p>\n
I was talking to this supporter the other day, and he shared some feelings with me that I wanted to share with you, because you might be feeling the same way.<\/p>\n
He said: \u201cI\u2019m sick and tired of everything I read and everywhere I hear telling me that my wife\u2019s behavior is not her fault just because she\u2019s got bipolar disorder. I think that\u2019s just an excuse for unacceptable behavior.<\/p>\n