{"id":454,"date":"2008-12-10T10:16:53","date_gmt":"2008-12-10T14:16:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.bipolarcentral.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/?p=454"},"modified":"2009-03-12T01:56:51","modified_gmt":"2009-03-12T05:56:51","slug":"bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/","title":{"rendered":"Bipolar Supporter and The Pelican Story"},"content":{"rendered":"<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Hi,<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Hope your day is going well.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">I am already behind schedule and it&#8217;s only the morning.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Okay a friend of mind told me this story about when she was vacationing on the beach in Florida:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">One morning, she was having coffee on her patio overlooking the beach (some vacation, huh?), and she saw this pelican fly into a tree (I didn&#8217;t even know pelicans could fly, did you?).<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Anyway, this pelican got stuck in the tree.  Every little while, it would flap its wings, but no go. So it would just sit there for awhile and try again, but still no go. My friend just sat there, watching this pelican&#8230;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">And watching&#8230;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">And watching&#8230;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Until&#8230; To hear the end of the story, scroll down&#8230;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Keep scrolling&#8230;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Almost there&#8230;<br \/>\nOk, here&#8217;s what happened: After about an hour&#8230; The pelican just flew away! So here&#8217;s the question:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Was the pelican really stuck in the first place, or was it just taking a sun bath? LOL<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">But here was my friend&#8217;s point, and why she told me this story:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">See, she&#8217;s a supporter of a loved one with bipolar disorder, and she knows I do a lot of work with supporters.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">She also knows that in my courses\/systems, I teach about the difference between being a good supporter and being an enabler:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?<br \/>\nVisit:<br \/>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/report11\">http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/report11<\/a><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">SUPPORTING A CHILD\/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?<br \/>\nVisit:<br \/>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/www.bipolarparenting.com\">http:\/\/www.bipolarparenting.com<\/a><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?<br \/>\nVisit:<br \/>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/www.survivebipolar.net\">http:\/\/www.survivebipolar.net<\/a><br \/>\nSo how does this relate to my friend and her story?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">She was saying that several times when watching (what she thought was) that stuck pelican, she wanted to go over and rescue it.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Just like she wants to rescue her husband every time he gets himself &#8220;stuck.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">So her question to me, just like so many emails I get from other supporters, was this:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">How do you know when you&#8217;re being a good supporter and when you&#8217;re being an enabler?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Well, I go into detail about enabling in my course, but simply put:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">ENABLING is when you do something for the other person that they can (should) do for themselves. The question of whether you&#8217;re a good supporter or an enabler becomes tricky when you&#8217;re dealing with a loved one in an episode.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Do you cover for them?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Do you rescue them?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Do you &#8220;fix&#8221; the situation?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Do you try to make things easier for them?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Do you accept unacceptable behavior?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Do you tolerate things from them that you would never tolerate from anyone else?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;-<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">As difficult as these questions are, these could be signs of  an enabler. OR&#8230;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Do you make them take responsibility for their actions?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Do you allow them to suffer the consequences of their own poor decisions and bad behavior?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Do you set limits and boundaries (and stick to them)?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Do you make it clear that you will not accept unacceptable behavior?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">When they get &#8220;stuck,&#8221; do you make them get themselves out of their own jam?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;-<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">As difficult as these second set of questions are, these are signs of  a good supporter instead of an enabler. I know it&#8217;s hard, because you care for your loved one. But if you continue to rescue them, they&#8217;ll continue to let you.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">What do you think?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">FIND OUT WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT ME<br \/>\nVisit: <a href=\"http:\/\/www.bipolarcentral.com\/testimonials\">http:\/\/www.bipolarcentral.com\/testimonials<\/a><\/p>\n<p>David Oliver is the author of the shocking guide \u201cBipolar Disorder\u2014The REAL Silent Killer.\u201d  <strong><a href=\"http:\/\/www.hypertracker.com\/go\/Post\/BP_Kills_BlogAd\/\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">Click Here<\/span><\/a><\/strong> to get <strong>FREE Information<\/strong> sent via email on how and why bipolar disorder kills.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Hi,<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Hope your day is going well.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">I am already behind schedule and it&#8217;s only the morning.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Okay a friend of mind told me this story about when she was vacationing on the beach in Florida:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">One morning, she was having coffee on her patio overlooking the beach (some vacation, huh?), and she saw this pelican fly into a tree (I didn&#8217;t even know pelicans could fly,<\/p>\n<p> <a href=\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/\" class=\"more-link pull-right\" rel=\"bookmark\">Continue Reading<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v21.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Bipolar Supporter and The Pelican Story - Bipolar Supporter Blog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Bipolar Supporter and The Pelican Story - Bipolar Supporter Blog\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Hi, Hope your day is going well. I am already behind schedule and it&#8217;s only the morning. Okay a friend of mind told me this story about when she was vacationing on the beach in Florida: One morning, she was having coffee on her patio overlooking the beach (some vacation, huh?), and she saw this pelican fly into a tree (I didn&#8217;t even know pelicans could fly, Continue Reading\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Bipolar Supporter Blog\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2008-12-10T14:16:53+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2009-03-12T05:56:51+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"David Oliver\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"David Oliver\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"David Oliver\",\"@id\":\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/#\/schema\/person\/bdb1948c35c678d8a189cbe999dcad75\"},\"headline\":\"Bipolar Supporter and The Pelican Story\",\"datePublished\":\"2008-12-10T14:16:53+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2009-03-12T05:56:51+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/\"},\"wordCount\":605,\"commentCount\":23,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/#\/schema\/person\/bdb1948c35c678d8a189cbe999dcad75\"},\"articleSection\":[\"Daily Bipolar Disorder Message\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/\",\"url\":\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/\",\"name\":\"Bipolar Supporter and The Pelican Story - Bipolar Supporter Blog\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2008-12-10T14:16:53+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2009-03-12T05:56:51+00:00\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Bipolar Supporter and The Pelican Story\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/#website\",\"url\":\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/\",\"name\":\"Bipolar Supporter Blog\",\"description\":\"With this blog, I want to keep all of you updated on important information about bipolar disorder and how it affects families. Here you can discuss effects of bipolar disorder, the risks of bipolar disorder, analyze some case studies and also can come to know about the treatments for bipolar disorder. Share with someone who has bipolar disorder today.\",\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/#\/schema\/person\/bdb1948c35c678d8a189cbe999dcad75\"},\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":[\"Person\",\"Organization\"],\"@id\":\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/#\/schema\/person\/bdb1948c35c678d8a189cbe999dcad75\",\"name\":\"David Oliver\",\"logo\":{\"@id\":\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\"},\"sameAs\":[\"http:\/\/www.bipolarcentral.com\"]}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Bipolar Supporter and The Pelican Story - Bipolar Supporter Blog","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Bipolar Supporter and The Pelican Story - Bipolar Supporter Blog","og_description":"Hi, Hope your day is going well. I am already behind schedule and it&#8217;s only the morning. Okay a friend of mind told me this story about when she was vacationing on the beach in Florida: One morning, she was having coffee on her patio overlooking the beach (some vacation, huh?), and she saw this pelican fly into a tree (I didn&#8217;t even know pelicans could fly, Continue Reading","og_url":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/","og_site_name":"Bipolar Supporter Blog","article_published_time":"2008-12-10T14:16:53+00:00","article_modified_time":"2009-03-12T05:56:51+00:00","author":"David Oliver","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"David Oliver","Est. reading time":"3 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/"},"author":{"name":"David Oliver","@id":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/#\/schema\/person\/bdb1948c35c678d8a189cbe999dcad75"},"headline":"Bipolar Supporter and The Pelican Story","datePublished":"2008-12-10T14:16:53+00:00","dateModified":"2009-03-12T05:56:51+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/"},"wordCount":605,"commentCount":23,"publisher":{"@id":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/#\/schema\/person\/bdb1948c35c678d8a189cbe999dcad75"},"articleSection":["Daily Bipolar Disorder Message"],"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"CommentAction","name":"Comment","target":["http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/#respond"]}]},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/","url":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/","name":"Bipolar Supporter and The Pelican Story - Bipolar Supporter Blog","isPartOf":{"@id":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/#website"},"datePublished":"2008-12-10T14:16:53+00:00","dateModified":"2009-03-12T05:56:51+00:00","breadcrumb":{"@id":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-supporter-and-the-pelican-story\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Bipolar Supporter and The Pelican Story"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/#website","url":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/","name":"Bipolar Supporter Blog","description":"With this blog, I want to keep all of you updated on important information about bipolar disorder and how it affects families. Here you can discuss effects of bipolar disorder, the risks of bipolar disorder, analyze some case studies and also can come to know about the treatments for bipolar disorder. Share with someone who has bipolar disorder today.","publisher":{"@id":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/#\/schema\/person\/bdb1948c35c678d8a189cbe999dcad75"},"potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":"required name=search_term_string"}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":["Person","Organization"],"@id":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/#\/schema\/person\/bdb1948c35c678d8a189cbe999dcad75","name":"David Oliver","logo":{"@id":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/"},"sameAs":["http:\/\/www.bipolarcentral.com"]}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/454"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=454"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/454\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1017,"href":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/454\/revisions\/1017"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=454"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=454"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=454"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}