Hi,<\/p>\n
I got this email from a woman, and I want to share it with you because I have something important to say about it:<\/p>\n
Dear Dave:<\/p>\n
I am a really strong Christian, but I am about to give up on my husband. I thought I had enough<\/p>\n
faith to get us through his bipolar episodes, but I guess I just don\u2019t. He gets so depressed, and then he talks about suicide, and I just don\u2019t know whether to take him seriously or not, and all I want to do is leave him but then I feel guilty just for wanting to do that.<\/p>\n
I\u2019m just so tired! I thought he would be the one to take care of me, but now here I am taking care of him. I read in your emails that things would get better if I just didn\u2019t give up on him, but I\u2019m still waiting for things to get better.<\/p>\n
It\u2019s been a whole month, and I haven\u2019t seen any change \u2013 he just mopes around the house all the<\/p>\n
time. Do you think it\u2019s because I\u2019ve lost my faith? Do you think this is my fault?<\/p>\n
———————————————————————————————————————<\/p>\n
First of all, let me say that ALL references to suicide should be taken seriously.<\/p>\n
I get lots of emails from Christians who say a lot of the same things \u2013 supporters who are worried that it\u2019s their fault that their loved one is not getting better as fast as they think they should be.<\/p>\n
But let me tell you one thing for sure \u2013 your faith does not have ANYTHING to do with how fast<\/p>\n
or slow your loved one recovers from bipolar disorder!<\/p>\n
Now, this lady\u2019s email does NOT say anything about her spouse\u2019s treatment \u2013 Is he on medication? Is he going to see a psychiatrist? Is he seeing a therapist on a weekly basis? Is he in a bipolar support group? What is HE doing to help himself get better?<\/p>\n
Being a supporter and being a Christian doesn\u2019t mean you are expected to be the one to shoulder ALL the responsibility for your loved one\u2019s bipolar disorder yourself. Especially if your loved one isn\u2019t even trying. It\u2019s not your fault if they won\u2019t help themselves.<\/p>\n
If that is the case here, then no wonder this poor woman is so tired!<\/p>\n
Yes, it\u2019s a good thing to have faith. And yes, you can have bipolar disorder and still have faith.<\/p>\n
In fact, being a Christian and having bipolar disorder are not mutually exclusive \u2013 you can<\/p>\n
have\/be both! It doesn\u2019t mean there is something wrong with your faith, or that you don\u2019t have enough of it.<\/p>\n
But remember \u2013 your loved one\u2019s bipolar disorder is not YOUR responsibility. It is THEIRS.<\/p>\n
You can love them\u2026You can help them\u2026You can even pray for them. But you can NOT do their work for them. You don\u2019t want to get to the point where you don\u2019t make your loved one take responsibility for their own disorder.<\/p>\n
I do also talk about spirituality, and that praying and faith can help to keep a person\u2019s stress level<\/p>\n
down, and that is a good thing. So I would not say anything bad about a person\u2019s faith. Unless that faith is causing them to use that as an excuse for their loved one.<\/p>\n
This lady is right, I do tell people that things will get better if you hang in there with your loved one. But that is when you are BOTH working toward the same goal \u2013 when your loved one is taking their medication, going to see a therapist and psychiatrist, etc. These things don\u2019t have anything to do with faith.<\/p>\n
These are things that everyone who has bipolar disorder should do to get better. In this case,<\/p>\n
faith is just icing on the cake!<\/p>\n
Well, I have to go!<\/p>\n
Your Friend,<\/p>\n
Dave<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Hi,<\/p>\n
I got this email from a woman, and I want to share it with you because I have something important to say about it:<\/p>\n
Dear Dave:<\/p>\n
I am a really strong Christian, but I am about to give up on my husband. I thought I had enough<\/p>\n
faith to get us through his bipolar episodes, but I guess I just don\u2019t. He gets so depressed, and then he talks about suicide,<\/p>\n