{"id":2074,"date":"2009-08-04T09:20:21","date_gmt":"2009-08-04T13:20:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.bipolarcentral.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/?p=2074"},"modified":"2009-08-04T09:20:21","modified_gmt":"2009-08-04T13:20:21","slug":"bipolar-disorder-and-the-a-word","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-disorder-and-the-a-word\/","title":{"rendered":"Bipolar Disorder and the A-Word"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Hi,<\/p>\n<p>How are you today?<\/p>\n<p>I had something happen to me recently that was real bad.<\/p>\n<p>I had someone steal my identity.<\/p>\n<p>It was someone on the Internet, too, so they are &#8220;virtually&#8221; stealing my identity.<\/p>\n<p>And then they are saying some things about me that are NOT true.  But this really hurts me, because<\/p>\n<p>what defense do I have?<\/p>\n<p>If someone slanders you in real life, you can get a lawyer and sue them.<\/p>\n<p>But if they do it on the Internet, you can&#8217;t do that.<\/p>\n<p>This makes me so mad!<\/p>\n<p>I don&#8217;t know why this guy is doing it, either.<\/p>\n<p>And I want to ask, Why me?<\/p>\n<p>But I&#8217;ve been thinking about what I really feel here.<\/p>\n<p>I decided I feel angry, and I wish this person could be stopped and held accountable for their actions.<\/p>\n<p>That&#8217;s the A-Word.<\/p>\n<p>ACCOUNTABLE<\/p>\n<p>When you care about someone with bipolar disorder and they go into an episode, you may feel the way I do.<\/p>\n<p>Your loved one will do things in an episode that they normally wouldn&#8217;t do.<\/p>\n<p>And you probably want them to be held accountable for their actions, behavior, and consequences.<\/p>\n<p>It would be great if your loved one would just stop doing what they&#8217;re doing, and realize these things for themselves, wouldn&#8217;t it?<\/p>\n<p>Just like I wish this guy would stop doing what he is doing to me.<\/p>\n<p>But wishing isn&#8217;t going to change things.<\/p>\n<p>Sometimes we just can&#8217;t do anything about the situation.<\/p>\n<p>I know, that&#8217;s a real hard pill to swallow.<\/p>\n<p>Your instincts may tell you to yell at your loved one for what they&#8217;re doing, but that won&#8217;t get you anywhere (except in a fight, which you can&#8217;t win when they&#8217;re in an episode).<\/p>\n<p>You may want to reason with them\u2026<\/p>\n<p>But that can also be a dead end street.<\/p>\n<p>As I talk about in my courses\/systems, when someone with bipolar disorder goes into an episode, they are not rational.  So reasoning with them can be a very difficult (sometimes impossible) thing to do.<\/p>\n<p>SUPPORTING AN ADULT WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?<\/p>\n<p>Visit:<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/report11\">http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/report11<\/a><\/p>\n<p>SUPPORTING A CHILD\/TEEN WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER?<\/p>\n<p>Visit:<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.bipolarparenting.com\">http:\/\/www.bipolarparenting.com<\/a><\/p>\n<p>HAVE BIPOLAR DISORDER?<\/p>\n<p>Visit:<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.survivebipolar.net\">http:\/\/www.survivebipolar.net<\/a><\/p>\n<p>As a supporter, you may have been covering up for your loved one&#8217;s behavior (while secretly feeling resentful toward them).<\/p>\n<p>But all that does is KEEP them from being held accountable.<\/p>\n<p>You may make excuses for their actions and behavior to yourself, to justify what they&#8217;re doing.<\/p>\n<p>But that also KEEPS them from being accountable.<\/p>\n<p>In both those cases, you aren&#8217;t doing anything, really.<\/p>\n<p>If you yell at them, you&#8217;re doing something, but it won&#8217;t make them accountable.<\/p>\n<p>If you cover up for them or make excuses to yourself, that won&#8217;t make them accountable, either.<\/p>\n<p>But every episode has its consequences.<\/p>\n<p>And you can make your loved one be accountable for that.<\/p>\n<p>For example, if they got caught shoplifting, they will have legal consequences that they will have to face, and you can&#8217;t do it for them.<\/p>\n<p>If they began abusing alcohol and\/or drugs in a manic episode, they will have consequences.<\/p>\n<p>They may have legal consequences they will have to be held accountable for.<\/p>\n<p>Or they may now be an alcoholic or addict even after the episode is over\u2026<\/p>\n<p>And they are accountable for that.<\/p>\n<p>The main thing about holding your loved one accountable for their actions, behavior, and consequences, is that you do NOT make excuses for them, and you don&#8217;t cover for them.<\/p>\n<p>Some supporters, however, believe that they should help their loved one in these cases, and they do cover up and make excuses for them.<\/p>\n<p>Do you agree with me, or these other supporters?<\/p>\n<p>Or do you think my way is too harsh?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Hi,<\/p>\n<p>How are you today?<\/p>\n<p>I had something happen to me recently that was real bad.<\/p>\n<p>I had someone steal my identity.<\/p>\n<p>It was someone on the Internet, too, so they are &#8220;virtually&#8221; stealing my identity.<\/p>\n<p>And then they are saying some things about me that are NOT true.  But this really hurts me, because<\/p>\n<p>what defense do I have?<\/p>\n<p>If someone slanders you in real life,<\/p>\n<p> <a href=\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-disorder-and-the-a-word\/\" class=\"more-link pull-right\" rel=\"bookmark\">Continue Reading<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v21.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Bipolar Disorder and the A-Word - Bipolar Supporter Blog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"http:\/\/www.bipolarsupporter.com\/bipolarsupporterblog\/bipolar-disorder-and-the-a-word\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Bipolar Disorder and the A-Word - Bipolar Supporter Blog\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Hi, How are you today? I had something happen to me recently that was real bad. I had someone steal my identity. It was someone on the Internet, too, so they are &#8220;virtually&#8221; stealing my identity. And then they are saying some things about me that are NOT true. But this really hurts me, because what defense do I have? 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