Hi,
Experts say that stress is the leading cause of stroke and heart attack in this country. And one of the biggest causes of stress in a person’s life can be frustration. I know that when I was trying to deal with my mom’s bipolar disorder, I had to go through a lot of frustration. I mean, on a daily basis. I was frustrated all the time! I would try to help her…I would think we were seeing some progress…And then something would happen…And it would seem like we’d be back to square
one. It was so frustrating!
Today, I want to talk about 3 things that are pointless and frustrating for you when it comes to
your loved one and their bipolar disorder. Because if you know about these 3 things, and you realize how pointless they are, and you can avoid these 3 things, then you can also avoid the frustration that comes with them. Then your stress level will decrease. And you will not only be a better bipolar supporter, but you will also have a better life for yourself. You will be healthier in all ways, too. Because, like I said earlier, stress can really take a toll on you physically, as well
as mentally and emotionally. So if you want to feel better, you need to pay attention to these 3 things that I’m going to tell you about.
The first thing that is pointless and frustrating when it comes to your loved one and their bipolar
disorder is that you can’t change them. I know that may seem like a simple thing, and you may even deny that you do it, but think about it. You may try to change them without even thinking
about it. It may be something that you do unconsciously, in other words. You just may want them to recover from their bipolar disorder so badly that you try to influence what they do or how they do it, without meaning to. And that may go against their nature. The fact is that they are going to recover at their own pace, regardless of what you do or what you want. And you just can’t help that. Anything else is pointless and frustrating.
The second thing that is pointless and frustrating is that you can’t make them do anything they
don’t want to do. For example: Say they don’t want to go see their therapist. You can’t make them go. Even if you could, you can’t make them talk to the therapist or open up and share what’s going on with them. So it’s pointless to even try – you just can’t make them do it if they don’t want to. Unless you’re the parent of a child with bipolar disorder, you just can’t make your loved one do something that they don’t want to do. Usually, people with bipolar disorder have very strong wills, and they will fight you if you try to make them do something that they don’t want to do. So trying to do it is pointless and frustrating.
The third thing that is pointless and frustrating is…You can’t fight with them. You know what I’m talking about. Like when your loved one goes into a rage about something…And no matter what you do…You just know you’re not going to win. But the thing is, you have to understand that the point is that it’s not about winning or losing. Because your loved one will keep going until they think they’ve “won” anyway. The point is that even fighting with them is just pointless and frustrating to begin with. So you have to find a way to de-escalate the fight. To somehow end it early, with the least amount of frustration for you.
That’s what all these points are about. Decreasing your frustration. If you know about these situations, you can avoid them, and then you can decrease your frustration.
Well, I have to go!
Your Friend,
Dave